Forgiveness
Wives, I interviewed Enrique Pascal last week on Money and Marriage Xposed and this Brother shared the real about forgiveness. We didn’t even get to the forgiveness and finances part; however what he shared was dynamic when it comes to individuals and marriages.
I want you to listen to this interview if you struggle with unforgiveness because he clearly gives you a step that you can take to make it better. Furthermore, he shared about why marriages are under attack. Let’s face it they are even moreso now than I think they have ever been before. I agree with what he has shared and hopefully within the next few weeks will have him on for Part 2 and address the remaining issues.
Go to this link below and I highly recommend just listening and then listen a second time with pen and paper. Below is the link to listen to Enrique Pascal teach on forgiveness. I have not ever heard forgiveness taught like this and you deserve to hear it for yourselves. What was shared could definitely impact your relationship.
Lack of money impacts behavior
Oftentimes a lack of money impacts behavior and it doesn’t matter if it is the husband or the wife. The stress of not having enough money to pay bills, take vacations or even purchase necessities can cause people to act out of character. Think about it… when is the last time one of your girlfriends contacted you and was complaining about her husband and finances?
What do you think after listening to her? Did you agree with what she was saying and how she handled the situation? Or did you offer her a suggestion on a different way of sharing with her husband about their financial stress and current issue?
When you think about your own marriage, as the Wife CFO how do you behave when there is a lack of money? Does your behavior change, your words or even you attitude? Remember Wives, you set the tone for your households. What you think, say and believe about a certain situation is what everyone else will think, say and believe. Choose your words carefully, as well as your actions.
If there is a shortage in your marital finances, then you can take steps to address the shortage and work on having a surplus. For example:
1) Review all of the marital expenses – automatic deductions and all monthly expenses
2) Do not forget to include recreation expenses – restaurant eating, movies, etc.
3) For the next week, write down everything that you spend money on. (You might be surprised at how much is being spent on wants versus needs i.e. – vending machines, frozen coffee, smoothie etc.)
4) Where can you cut costs? Take steps to cut those costs so that you can have a surplus.
I strongly recommend if you have a surplus that you do not turn around and use that for “fun money” but apply it towards a bill, emergency account or vacation fund. This way you are working towards a financial goal that can impact the marriage and family.
Roles of Money in Marriage
Wives in a previous post, I shared about how a lack of money can impact behavior. You have seen it whether in your own marriage, someone in the family or even a friend’s marriage how a shortage changes people’s behavior. Even to this day, money is a serious topic that is often avoided because of shame, fear and even misunderstanding. I want to give you this exercise and don’t take it lightly. This could actually give you some insight into what you think about money.
Don’t worry, we are definitely going to get into Mindset – not this post. Understandably you are aware that it takes money to pay the bills. On a sheet of paper, write down what all the roles are of money for your marriage. There is more to money than paying the bills and I encourage you to take this time to figure it out if you have not ever thought about it this way.
Knowing the roles of money in your marriage can impact your marriage in several ways. For example – can aid you in planning for retirement, college education for kids and even if you desire to start that business. Those are just a few things that knowing the roles of money could change long term. As a matter of fact, determine if the different roles of money is a short-term or a long-term.
I invite you to send in or leave a comment on what you believe are some of the roles of money for your marriage to share with other Wife CFOs. I remember I wrote a post for a wedding website last year pertaining to this and one of the editors of the site shared how on point this was.